The Messy Middle

The Messy Middle Comes Before Goal Success

I’m not in great shape. I’m healthy-ish and have never been in serious bad shape. I have never had six pack abs. I kinda want them. So, why don’t I have them? The messy middle.

The Messy Middle

Maybe You Can Relate

I have started so many projects in my life. I think I am a serial starter. At 16 I got excited about working out. I played a lot of hockey and knew lifting weights would elevate my game. I bought a set of free weights at a garage sale and started day one with curls. On day two I was ready for bench press; except I didn’t have a bench or money. I did have a pile of discarded wood and some creativity so I spent the next few days building a DIY weightlifting bench.

It Was Awesome, For About a Week

January at the gym is crazy. Tons of people and long lines for the machines. Workouts take twice as long. February, not so busy. Every machine is free. We are a society of starters, not finishers. The people who stick to their goals and cross the finish line are uniquely successful.

Last year I started the six-pack challenge. A five-month challenge that consisted of daily rabbit food, running and Focus T25. So, what happened? The messy middle. The worst part is I was so close, making it four months and starting to see results.

30 Day Challenges

I have been doing 30 day challenges for years. I love to prove to myself that I can try new things or force myself to abstain from others. I have successfully completed numerous no soda, waking up at 5am or eliminating refined sugar challenges. Why can I have success at 30 days but struggle with working out or the six-pack challenge?

It isn’t just fitness goals that start with a flurry and fade quickly. In 2006, I started a company providing outdoor recreational gear for girls age 5-15 (the ages my daughters would soon be). I build a website, designed products, paid for a logo and then hid the plans in the desk drawer.

Goals are easy to set and easy to start. The real success comes from completion. (tweet that)

Goal Completion is Like Running Marathons

My wife is a runner, she lives to run; I run to live, there’s a difference.

She would participate in big races around our area and I would take the kids to go support her. The start of the race is easy, you are surrounded by other committed runners, you have your friends cheering, the loud music, the announcer, the energy in the air.

You Are Ready

One mile into the race you find yourself running down an empty street. Fast runners are way out ahead, slower runners too far behind, no more cheering friends or loud music and you feel alone.

26.1 Miles is a Long Way

Goal completion can feel the same way. With passion, you set goals and with excitement you start. Then you turn that first corner and your support system fades out of view. What were you thinking? The messy middle.

We want to reach our goals, to find success. Intuitively we know that the finish line has family, loud music, free pancakes and participant medals. The finish line will be worth it, so how do we endure?

The Messy Middle

9 Practices to Endure the Messy Middle

  1. Power Through. Finishing is all about commitment, determination and perseverance. You must know why your goal is important to you. Understand the difference completion will make in your life. If important, sometimes you just need to put your head down and keep running
  2. Remember how far you have come. Perspective is powerful. When stuck in the messy middle it helps to look back and see how far you have come in such a short time. You will be surprised. You may have a long way yet to go but take a moment and celebrate the milestones.
  3. Focus on those who believe in you. You are not alone, though at times it can feel that way. Remember when you stood at the starting line full of passion and enthusiasm? You were surrounded by friends, family and other goal seekers. They are still there cheering you on, even if you cannot hear them.
  4. Review and repeat. Think about what has worked, what has gotten you to this point in your success journey. Do more of that. Review what isn’t working, do less of that. Never let your head hit the pillow without first reviewing your goals and recognizing your efforts. Make it a routine that will keep you anchored.
  5. Get an accountability partner. Disappointment is a powerful motivator. When journeying through the messy middle of goal completion have mentor or partner keep you accountable. Find someone who trusts you and is vested in your achievement.
  6. Just Start- The journey of 100 miles, or 26.1 miles, or goal completion, starts with a single step. The most important step you take is the next one, the one that builds momentum. (tweet that)
  7. Respect the past but envision future- Keep your eyes on the reward of goal completion. When you set your goal, you had a specific outcome imagined. At the time, that outcome was what you wanted, nothing has changed, it is still there.
  8. Ensure the important continues. You should only start goals worth finishing. Once begun, focus on why each step is important for that goal. If it isn’t important let it go and move on.
  9. Cheat Day (optional)- The reason the 30-day challenges are easy is because they have a clear set 30 days with little time for the messy middle. In longer challenges a small conscious cheat can give you the encouragement needed to keep going. Like taking a small break during your marathon, it can give you the strength to push on, but only if you keep committed. Don’t let the small break become the beginning of the end.

The messy middle is always the hardest part of our success journey because we don’t know how long it will last. When we finish, we can look back, laugh and realize it wasn’t as bad as you thought. It was worth it.


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